Mustahab acts of Burial (Dafn)
635. It is Mustahab that the depth of the grave should be approximately equal to the height of an average person and the dead body be buried in the nearest graveyard, except when the graveyard which is situated farther is better due to some reasons, like if pious persons are buried there or people go there in large number for Fatiha.
It is also recommended that the coffin is placed on the ground a few yards away from the grave and then taken to the grave by halting three times briefly. It should be placed on the ground every time and then lifted before finally it is lowered into the grave at the 4th time.
And if the dead body is of a male, it should be placed on the ground at the 3rd time in such a manner that its head should be towards the lower side of the grave and at the 4th time it should be lowered into the grave from the side of its head.
And if the dead body is of a female, it should be placed on the ground at the 3rd time towards the Qibla and should be lowered into the grave sidewise and a cloth should be spread over the grave while lowering it. It is also Mustahab that the dead body should be taken out of the coffin and lowered into the grave very gently, and the prescribed supplications should be recited before and during burying the dead body; and after the dead body has been lowered into the niche, the ties of its shroud should be unfastened and its cheek should be placed on earth, and an earthen pillow should be done up under its head and some unbacked bricks or lumps of clay should be placed behind its back so that the dead body may not return flat on its back.
Before closing the niche, the person reciting the Talqin should hold with his right hand the right shoulder of the dead body and should place his left hand tightly on its left shoulder and take his mouth near its ear and shaking its shoulders should say thrice: Isma' Ifham Ya Fulana ibn e Fulanin
Instead of Fulana ibn Fulanin, the name of the dead person and his father should be called. For example, if the name of the dead person is Muhammad and his father's name 'Ali it should be said thrice: Isma' Ifham Ya Mohammad bin 'Ali.
And then he should say:
Hal Anta 'Alal 'Ahdil Lazi Farqtana 'Alayhi Min Shahadati An La ilaha illal lahu Wahdahu La Sharika Lah Wa Anna Mohammadan Sallal Lahu 'Alayhi Wa Alihi 'Abduhu Wa Rasuluhu Wa Sayyidun Nabiyyina Wa Khatamul Mursalina Wa Anna 'Aliyyan Amirul Mu'minina Wa Sayyidul Wasiyyina Wa Imamun Iftarazallahu Ta'tahu 'Alal 'Alamina Wa Annal Hasana Wal Husaina Wa 'Aliyyabnal Husaini Wa Mohammadabna 'Aliyyin Wa Ja'farabna Mohammadin Wa Musabna Ja'farin Wa 'Aliyyabna Musa Wa Mohammadabna'Aliyyin Wa 'Aliyyabna Mohammadin Wal Hasanabna 'Aliyyin Wal Qa'imal Hujjatal Mahdi Salawatullahi 'Alayhim A'i'mmatul Mu'minina Wa Hujajullahi 'Alal Khalqi Ajma'ina Wa A'immatuka A'immatu Hudan Abrar Ya Fulana ibn Fulanin.
(Instead of Fulana ibn Fulanin the name of the dead person and his father should be called) and then the following words should be said:
Iza Atakal Malakaanil Muqarrabaani Rasulayni Min 'Indillahi Tabaraka Wa Ta'ala Wa Sa'alaka 'An Rabbika Wa 'An Nabiyyika Wa 'An Dinika Wa 'An Kitabika Wa 'An Qiblatika Wa 'An A'immatika Fala Takhaf Wa La Tahzan Wa'qul Fi Jawabi Hima,
Allahu Rabbi Wa Mohammadun Sallal Lahu 'Alayhi Wa Alihi Nabiyyi Wal Islamu Dini Wal Qur'anu Kitabi Wal Ka'batu Qiblati Wa Amirul Mu'minina 'Aliyybnu Abi Talib Imami Wal Hasanubnu 'Aliyyi Nil Mujtaba Imami Wal Husainubnu 'Aliyyi Nish – Shahidu Bi – Karbala Imami Wa 'Aliyyun Zaynul 'Abidina Imami Wa Mohammadu Nil Baqiru Imami Wa Ja'faru Nis Sadiqu Imami Wa Musal Kazimu Imami Wa 'Aliyyu – Nir Riza Imami Wa Mohammadu Nil Jawadu Imami Wa 'Aliyyu Nil Hadi Imami Wal Hasanul 'Askari Imami Wal Hujjatul Muntazar Imami Ha Ula'i Salawatullahi 'Alayhim Ajma'in A'i'mmati Wa Sadati Wa Qadati Wa Shufa - a'i Bihim Atawalla Wa Min A'daihim Atabarra'u Fid Dunya Wal Akhirati Thumma I'lam Ya Fulana ibn Fulanin
(Instead of Fulana ibn Fulanin the name of the dead person and his father should be called) and thereafter it should be said:
Innallaha Tabaraka Wa Ta'ala Ni'mar – Rabbo Wa Anna Mohammadan Sallal Lahu 'Alayhi Wa Alihi Ni'mar Rasulo Wa Anna 'Aliyyabna Abi Talib Wa Awladahul Ma'suminal A'i'mmatal Ithna 'Asharah Ni'mal A'i'mmah Wa Anna Ma Ja'a Bihi Mohammadun Sallallahu 'Alayhi Wa Alihi Haqqun Wa Annal Mawta Haqqun Wa Suwala Munkarin Wa Nakirin Fil Qabri Haqqun Wal Ba'tha Haqqun Wan Nushoora Haqqun Wassiraata Haqqun Wal Wa Tatayiral Kutubi Haqqun Wa Annal Jannata Haqqun Wan – Naara Haqqun Wa Annas Sa'ata Aatiyatun La Rayba Fiha Wa Annallaha Yab'athu Man Fil Qubur.
Then the following words should be said: Afahimta Ya Fulana, instead of Fulana the name of the dead person should be called, and thereafter the following should be said:
Thabbatakallahu Bil Qawlith Thabit Wa Hadakallahu Ila Siratim Mustaqim wa 'Arrafallahu Baynaka Wa Bayna Awliya'ika Fi Mustaqarrim Min Rahmatih.
Then the following words should be uttered: Allahumma Jafil Arza 'An Jambayhi Wa As'id Biruhihi Ilayka Wa Laqqihi Minka Burhanan, Allahumma 'Afwaka 'Afwaka.
636. It is Mustahab that the person who lowers the dead body in the grave should be Pak, bareheaded and barefooted and he should climb out of the grave from the feet side. Moreover, persons, other than the near relatives of the deceased, should put the dust into the grave with the back side of their hands and recite the following: Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Raji'un. If the dead person is a woman, her Mahram and in the absence of a Mahram her kinsmen should lower her in the grave.
637. It is Mustahab that the grave be square or rectangular in shape and its height equal to four fingers' span. A sign should be fixed on it for the purpose of identification and water should be poured on it, and then those present should place their hands on the grave parting their fingers and thrusting them into earth.
Then recite Surah Al – Qadr 7 times and pray for the forgiveness of the departed soul and say: Allahumma Jafil Arza 'An Jambayhi Wa As'id Ilayka Ruhahu Wa Laqqihi Minka Rizwana Wa Askin Qabrahu Min Rahmatika Ma Tughneehi Bihi 'An Rahmati Man Siwaka.
638. It is Mustahab that when the people who attended the funeral have departed, the guardian of the dead person or the person whom the guardian grants permission should recite the prescribed supplications for the dead person.
639. It is Mustahab that after the burial, the bereaved family is consoled, praying for their wellbeing. However, if the condolence is given long after the event, and if it serves to refresh the sorrowful memories, then it should be avoided.
It is Mustahab that food be sent to the members of the family of the deceased for 3 days. It is, however, Makrooh to take meal with them in their homes.
640. It is also Mustahab that a person should observe patience on the death of his near ones, especially on the death of his son, and, whenever the memory of the departed soul crosses his mind, he should say: Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Raji'un and should recite the holy Qur'an for the sake of the departed.
A man should visit the graves of his parents and pray there for the blessings of Allah for himself and should make the grave solid so that it may not be easily ruined.
641. One should refrain from scratching one's face or body and hurting himself.
642. It is not permissible to tear one's clothes on the death of anyone except on the death of one's father and brother.
643. If a wife mourning the death of a husband scratches her face causing blood to come out or pulls her hair, or husband mourning the death of his wife or child tears his clothes, then as per Kaffara they should set a slave free, or feed ten poor, or provide them dress, and if one is not able to do that then should fast for three days. And if a wife mourning the death of a husband cuts her hair, then as per Kaffara, she should fast for two consecutive months or set a slave free, or feed sixty poor.
644. As per obligatory precaution, while weeping over the death of any person one's voice should not be very loud.